Lard coming soon to a venue near you !

Among the criticisms most often directed at our humble blog, the one that sticks out is that we feature a lot more posts on Magister Albert than on the other ex-members of Reverend Bozorre… A fair criticism, of course, but we can’t help it if Albert’s footinmouthitis provides us with material a lot more often. Perhaps if Kimi and Jari were more vocal about their political and moral views, we’d have more fodder for our cannons.

Luckily, however, this month we can bring you great tidings from the camp of Lord Vicar, who have often been heralded, by Kimi himself of course, as the “natural successor to Reverend Bizarre” (there’s actually a post on this very subject somewhere in our unpublished archives, but none of our staff can keep from laughing long enough to edit and publish it), as they are going on… drum roll… tour! Yes, tour!

sombrero

Not sure ourselves what Sombreros have to do with doom metal, but let’s stick to the facts: four dates all in all, lest the boys get tired or bored of playing the same generic dross over and over, with the last date taking place at the prestigious “TBA” venue…

While our staff reporters are busy making arrangements for which of these dates they are going to attend, we would like to wish the boys a series of safe journeys, well-portioned meals and steady merch sales (an aspect of touring that’s very close to Kimi’s heart), and suggest that if Kimi and Jussi did the tour on their bikes, this could greatly contribute towards their overall health and well-being. Jus’ sayin’ though, we’re not medical experts.

Lard coming soon to a venue near you !

Pleased to Meat you !

While perusing the informative and illuminating Opium Warlords facebook page, which never ceases to intrigue, challenge and delight us, we stumbled upon a post that involved featuring one of their songs on a streaming portal/website… “Ah, lovely!”, we thought. “This might help save some units from the dust of the record label office.” However, upon clicking the link, we were horrified -HORRIFIED!- to see a steak, mincemeat and other vulgarities…

meat

“How strange,” we thought, tucking into our spinach, fennel and quinoa salad, “that a self-proclaimed advocate of vegetarianism like Albert Witchfinder should not only allow one of his songs to feature on a website that glorifies meat consumption, but also to unashamedly post about it on facebook…” One plump radish later, we remembered who it is we’re talking about, so we shrugged it off, and went back to our hummus…

Enjoy the song, try it with a side order of meatballs and a dollop of bacon-fried hypocrisy:

http://www.themetaldeli.com/

Pleased to Meat you !

All work and no play makes Jackass a dull boy

In two almost consecutive facebook posts (-Two more facebook posts? Are you sure he’s a recluse, Gandalf? -That’s what he says, Frodo, so it must be true…), dull boy Sami Albert Hynninen has compared recording vocals for Spiritus Mortis to “work” that he would rather avoid, while maintaining that he’s “waiting for [the recording of vocals for Tähtiportti] with delight and excitement!”.

Hypocrisy? Yes, we think so. “As it should be clear to everyone who has been following his updates/posts on this site”.

doom over the work

All work and no play makes Jackass a dull boy